


The Story of Tonight

by HopeSilverheart



Series: Loving Em at 2AM [54]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: (kind of), Aline & Helen & Clary & Maia Friendship, Alternate Universe - Hamilton Fusion, Background Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff, Girls can be Soldiers too, Girls in Love, Historical Inaccuracy, Humour, Insecure Helen Blackthorn, Love Confessions, Marriage Proposal, Teasing, They're all soldiers because I said so, song-fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:13:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25076674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HopeSilverheart/pseuds/HopeSilverheart
Summary: Helen didn’t know when Clary had been made aware of the less than lawful relationship between the two women, but she was more than grateful when Clary reached for Maia’s wrist and started dragging her away. “You guys have another round, we’ll see you on the other side!”“The other side of what?” Helen asked, her brows furrowing in confusion as Clary only winked before disappearing in the night, taking Maia and their raucous laughter with them.And then it was just Aline and Helen.Or: Helen loves Aline; she's just not sure Aline wants the same things she does.
Relationships: Helen Blackthorn/Aline Penhallow
Series: Loving Em at 2AM [54]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1764400
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13





	The Story of Tonight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thatnerdemryn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatnerdemryn/gifts).



> Enjoy the liberal use of hamilton song lyrics (;

Helen was pleasantly tipsy.

After Clary’s wedding to Isabelle Lightwood, Helen, Aline, and Maia had dragged her away from her new family and back to one of their favourite spots in New York City. It was nothing much, just an open space with plenty of places to lie down and relax, but they had made it theirs just a few days after they had first met Clary, and it meant the world to them.

They hadn’t been worth much back then, just a group of militia-issued women who wanted to drink and have some fun before they were forced away from the trenches and into a marriage none of them wanted. They still weren’t worth much, honestly, no matter how Clary’s new wife was – and wasn’t that an idea, two women getting married?

However, they all knew things had changed since the first time they had met, and Helen wondered if this was the last night they would get to spend together before Clary got too busy with her lovely wife and the rest of them were sent back onto the battlefield.

“Do you think Isabelle will accept your status as a soldier?” Aline asked, mirroring Helen’s thoughts. The blonde let her gaze linger on the beautiful soldier’s body, her uniform having been switched out for a beautiful gown Isabelle had kindly bought her. Aline always looked stunning, but that night, she _radiated._ “Or are we going to have to downgrade to a trio rather than a quartet?”

“You could always ask Lydia to join you,” Clary suggested, taking another sip of her drink and tossing her glass aside disgustedly once she realised she had already finished it. “But I don’t think Isabelle will ask me to step away from anything. She likes this side of me, for some reason, and her parents want to keep us apart so they certainly won’t mind being sent back into the thick of the war where I could get killed at any given time.”

“True that,” Maia snorted. “Your in-laws seem like a real piece of cake, Fairchild; I hope you’re ready for a life of hell and being kept either away from the family house or locked in a goddamned tower.”

“ _Adieu_ freedom,” Helen nodded. “Marriage isn’t an easy journey, Clary, but if anyone can tackle that challenge, it’s you.”

“I still can’t believe you got Isabelle Lightwood to marry you,” Aline sighed, waving her glass of whiskey at Clary suspiciously. “What kind of charms did you use? More importantly, how did you get her parents to give you their blessing? God, her _parents_. You’re rich now, Clary Fairchild; you can buy yourself as many dresses as you want to, you can go to the opera, buy us drinks every week-end… The options are limitless once you have a little money in your pockets.”

“That and shackles at your feet,” Clary pointed out, a small pout on her lips. “Isabelle is… She’s everything I could have ever wanted, honestly, but she was raised very differently from us, and I have a feeling my life isn’t going to be as easy as you guys think it will be.”

“Oh, we think nothing,” Maia shook her head rapidly. “Believe me, I wouldn’t switch places with you even if I was being held at gunpoint. Between alcohol, all the ladies I can dream of, and the thrill of the war, I’m perfectly content as I am. Marriage was never a part of the plan, and it never will be for as long as I’m sane and away from my parents’ influence.”

“I’ll drink to that!” Helen cheered, raising her drink and grinning when Clary had to scramble for her discarded glass before joining in on the fun. “Another round?”

“I’ll have to pass,” Clary sighed, her eyes darting back towards the Lightwood estate, its lights still bright and the music still loud even from a couple of streets away. “Isabelle is going to be waiting for me, and she’ll kill me if I tell her I forgot all about the night of our wedding because I got drunk out of my mind.”

“Oh please,” Aline scoffed. “As though you could ever forget a night like this one. It’s one for the history books, Fairchild! They’ll be telling our story in a hundred, two-hundred, hell _three-hundred_ years, and this night will mark the beginning of our new lives.”

“You mean my new life, right?” Clary teased, though her eyes flickered between Aline and Helen knowingly. The blonde didn’t know when Clary had been made aware of the less than lawful relationship between the two women, but she was more than grateful when Clary reached for Maia’s wrist and started dragging her away. “You guys have another round, we’ll see you on the other side!”

“The other side of what?” Helen asked, her brows furrowing in confusion as Clary only winked before disappearing in the night, taking Maia and their raucous laughter with them.

And then it was just Aline and Helen.

They had been friends from the very start, meeting on their first day as members of the militia and fighting for each other’s rights when the men around them got a little too misogynistic. They had been partners through it all, closer to each other than they were to anyone else – including Maia and Clary. It made sense, of course, since their relationship…

Well, since their relationship wasn’t exactly what it should have been. Helen wasn’t stupid; she knew romances between soldiers were a lot more common than people made them out to be. She had seen the looks Magnus and Alexander – _Lightwood_ , always a Lightwood – exchanged when the generals weren’t looking their way. She had noticed passing touches and meaningful glances exchanged between ‘friends’ when the sun had set and the world had turned quiet.

However, it didn’t make what Aline and she were doing right. They were two women and, unlike Isabelle and Clary, they didn’t have enough wealth or power to protect themselves from the rest of the world were they to get married. They cared for each other, but they weren’t as free as Clary was.

They never would be.

“The wedding was beautiful, wasn’t it?” Aline’s voice interrupted the quiet. The brunette was closer to Helen than she had been thirty seconds earlier, and Helen knew she should have pushed her away. They had to put an end to things, but _god_ she didn’t want to. “I never thought Clary would actually say yes, but I suppose love is a complicated emotion.”

Helen snorted. Wasn’t that the understatement of the year? If it wasn’t for love, Helen could have already been looking for a proper husband to marry; one who would satisfy her parents and make the world smile at her approvingly. If it wasn’t for love, Aline would have left the militia when her family had tried to pressure her to come back home. If it wasn’t for love, Helen would have already sailed back to France.

“It was a nice ceremony,” Helen agreed neutrally. “I’m happy for her, even though I don’t understand what our friends see in those insufferable Lightwoods. They must have a charm that’s only turned on around certain people, and Clary and Magnus were unlucky enough to be caught in their trap.”

“I don’t know,” Aline hummed, tugging Helen down until they were laying on the grass, their arms brushing together with every breath. “I think it’s rather romantic. Isabelle seems like a nice person, despite all the rumours going around about her promiscuity. Besides, we’re hardly the right people to judge her. And Magnus… Well, I think what he and Alexander have is special, and I think Isabelle’s older brother isn’t as cold and impassive as what he shows to the world.”

“Whatever,” Helen huffed. She didn’t want to think about their lucky friends and their powerful significant others. She didn’t want to think about them and be reminded of all the reasons why she could never have the same thing. “I should go home.”

“No, you shouldn’t.”

Aline’s words were firm, but Helen could hear the plea behind them. Her lover didn’t want her to leave without having had the chance to talk about their relationship, which was exactly why Helen had been in such a hurry to get away from the brunette. She was weak for Aline, and she knew there wasn’t much she wouldn’t do to make the other woman happy.

She wanted to resist it. She wanted to tell Aline that they both had a duty to their families, a duty to find a good husband who could provide them with stability and children. She wanted to run away and never come back, wanted to forget she had ever been weak enough to give in to her secret desires. She wanted…

She wanted Aline, all the time. She wanted her touches and her kisses and her gasps and her moans and her whispered confessions that only came when she thought Helen was asleep. She wanted what Clary had found Isabelle, but without all the complications of wealth and politics.

They could have it, she knew, if they really wanted it. They could get married, continue fighting in the militia and rise in the ranks just enough to save up some money and lead the life they had always dreamed up. But their life together would be doomed to be difficult, riddled with obstacles and criticisms and people who didn’t know how to mind their own business.

And while Helen thought she could handle that, she wasn’t sure Aline could. Her lover, despite the front she put up, had grown up in a good household with a strong family who she could always count on to support her. If she married Helen, a poor French woman whose only asset was her position in the war? There was no telling who would stay behind her and who would abandon her.

She wanted Aline, but she wasn’t sure Aline wanted what Helen could give her.

“We shouldn’t be doing this, Aline,” she murmured, forcing herself to keep looking at the sky instead of rolling over to gaze at the brunette. “I lo- I care about you, but we can’t keep acting like our relationship is going to work out when your parents keep pressuring you to go home. You’ll have to leave someday, and I’m not sure getting attached is the right call to make.”

“Since when have you cared about what our families want?” Aline frown, curling her fingers underneath Helen’s chin and tilting it towards her. They were so close, and yet Helen felt like they were on the brink of falling apart.

(And it would all be her fault.)

“Since I met the Lightwoods and understood what’s really at stake for you,” Helen whispered. “I saw the way Isabelle’s parents looked at their daughter, saw the way they looked at _Clary_. Can you honestly tell me that if we get married, things will be better for us than they are for them? Can you honestly tell me you won’t want to escape a life stuck to a woman who can’t give you anything other than-”

“Other than _what_ , Helen?” Aline asked her, her voice small and begging and desperate. “Because if what you can give me is love, then I’ll take it over everything else. Screw the money, screw my parents, screw my position in the militia; if it meant keeping your love forever, I would move to France and leave this entire country behind.”

“You don’t mean that, Aline,” Helen shook her head, raising her trembling hand and caressing her lover’s cheek gently. “I- I love you, _yes_ , but it isn’t enough. Can you honestly tell me you would relish being my wife even if I can’t give you the life you deserve?”

“I’d relish being _your_ wife,” Aline insisted, and her eyes were so full of love that Helen almost gave in and kissed her right there and then. “Don’t you think that would be enough, love? A life spent with the person I adore, getting to fall asleep next to her at night and wake up next to her in the morning? Because to me, it’s more than enough; I don’t need everything my parents raised me to believe in, because I have you now, and that’s worth more than anything else.”

She sounded so honest. She sounded like she believed everything she was saying, and Helen…

Helen had loved Aline for years. She had loved her when she had first met the bold and bright woman who hadn’t hesitate to leave a life of luxury behind just to fight for her country. She had loved her when they had kissed for the first time, basking in each other’s presence between fights. She had loved her when she had come back from France, troupes behind her, and Aline had been waiting for her at the port with a smile on her face.

She had loved her for what felt like a lifetime, and she would love her for another hundred lifetimes if that’s what it took to get it right. And if Aline felt even a fraction of what Helen did, if she truly didn’t care about her future…

“If I told you I wanted to leave, what would you say?”

Aline didn’t even hesitate.

“ _Stay_. Screw what your mind is telling you, Helen Blackthorn, and listen to your heart for once in your life. Stay, and I’ll show you that I meant everything I told you earlier. Stay, and I’ll make you the happiest wife in the States _and_ in France. Stay, and let me prove that I can’t do any better than you, because there’s not a single soul on this planet that could live up to the standards you’ve set. Stay, and fight with me until the end as you promised me you would.”

A small smile curled at Helen’s lips as she remembered the night she had promised Aline to stay with her until the very end of the war. It had been the first night they had spent together, and they had stayed in each other’s arms for hours after, tracing patterns on each other’s skins and talking about their lives until they were voiceless.

Aline had told Helen she wasn’t sure she would make it through the war. She had told her there were people out there who weren’t happy with the decision she had taken and were all too eager to marry her off to a proper man who would set her sights straight. So there and then, Helen had promised her to stay and give her reason to remain in the militia. She had promised France wouldn’t see her again until Aline was safe and sound, back with her family and free to choose the person she truly wanted to marry.

“And you promised me you would settle down with the right person,” Helen countered sadly, even as she yearned to press her mouth to Aline’s and consume her wholly. “l love you, Aline, never doubt that, but there’s a different between who you care for and who is right for you.”

“Is that what this is about, then?” Aline snapped, pulling away from Helen and glaring at her coldly. “You don’t think I’m right for you, so you’re going to put the blame on my family and act as though I’m the one who doesn’t want this marriage? You’re going to tell me Isabelle and Clary can make it work but we can’t, because… Because what, exactly? What’s holding us back, Helen?”

“Your family, an army, an ocean, the _world_!” Helen exclaimed, tears of frustration rolling down her face as she shifted closer to Aline again and rolled over until she was laying on top of her lover. “I want to marry you, Aline, but I don’t want to do it only to have you be torn away from me after a few months.”

“As if I’d let them do that,” Aline murmured brokenly. “I’m a soldier, Helen, I can take care of myself. So please, either ask me to marry you or leave forever, but do it for yourself, not for the people out there who’ll disagree with my lifestyle no matter who I end up with.”

_Marry her or leave forever_.

The latter would be so much easier. All she would have to do was take the first ship back to Le Havre and act as though the last few years of her life had never happened. Her family would welcome her with open arms, and she would find a good husband to marry or, if she was lucky, a good wife. She would never be completely satisfied, but she would be… content, at the very least.

The former, on the other hand, sounded like a disaster waiting to happen. Aline and she were both soldiers, which meant they could both die at any given moment. They were from different countries, which led to even more obstacles and problems for them to overcome. They were both women, which was both not an issue at all – if Isabelle and Clary could do it, then surely so could they? – and a huge one when it came to Aline’s family. Her parents didn’t have other children to rely on, not like the Lightwoods did.

It was the harder option, the one that would make her cry and scream in frustration, the one that would test her relationship over and over again until the only thing they had left was their love. But she would be fully satisfied; she would have the woman she loved, and she would be able to live in the country she adored, as soon as she dealt with France’s own problems.

“I’d still have to help my country if a revolution breaks out over there,” Helen said softly, lowering her forehead so it rested against Aline’s. “I would still have to check up on my family, and I would need to spend some time there every few years. We would have to be careful not to let it influence our positions within the militia, and we would have to make sure no one took advantage of our relationship to hurt us.”

“But…?”

“But Aline Penhallow, I love you with my entire heart,” Helen laughed delightedly, a grin lighting up her features. “Even though I’m an idiot who can’t seem to accept your feelings and who’s still terrified that something will go wrong, I love you. And I’ve wanted to marry you for years, so please, will you-”

“ _Yes_.”

Aline surged up to connect their lips, and Helen couldn’t remember why she had been fighting so hard to keep them apart. Alcohol was still flowing through her veins, making her feel pleasantly warm and a little more carefree now that Aline had soothed her worries. But despite the four drinks she had had that night, the only thing Helen was addicted to was her lover – her fiancée, her future wife, the love of her goddamned life.

Aline had been right. Who cared about what everyone else had to say? Who cared about how hard things would be for them? They had each other, and they would have forever to figure the rest out.

And that? Well that was definitely enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Heya guys! Thank you so much for reading! I really wanted to write some more Hamilton fusion and also wanted to write more femslash, so this happened! Heline stole my heart and I will die for both of these women. Also, if you think I don't know women couldn't be soldiers and get married in Hamilton's time, think again x) I just want them to be badass wives, is that too much to ask for? I hope you all enjoyed anyways!
> 
> Love, Junie. 
> 
> (find me on tumblr @hopesilverheart)


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